Today is not easy

Somedays it’s easy: balancing my writing life with the rest of my life. I shouldn’t say “easy,” really, because it’s never quite that – it’s more like somedays it’s manageable.

Today is not one of those days.

Today Full-TimeWork!Becca spent part of her day wondering when she was going to get laid off because she has no idea what quantifiable benefits she adds to the team, and she isn’t sure her bosses do either, in which case she and The Man will be screwed when her position gets cut and they lose her income. Today Health!Becca crammed in a mediocre lunchtime workout (which always leaves her feeling a little smelly and unfit to be around people afterward) in order for Likes-to-Contribute-to-Chores!Becca to come straight home and make dinner for her fiance, whose job is 1,000 times more stressful. Today Social!Becca felt awkward and overstretched, and Runs-a-Tight-Ship!Becca is appalled – just a-PALLED – at the current state of uncleanliness around the house and the dishes in the sink and the vacuuming and picking up and dear God in Heaven don’t get her started on the LAUNDRY for crying out loud.

And under all this noise is Writer!Becca. And she is not happy with all of these other Beccas taking up so much precious time. And she is dissatisfied with the progress of the WIP which should have been finished a week ago. And she is disappointed at the lack of temporal resources available in order to write, edit, blog, keep up with and comment on other blogs, network and, in general, do all the damn things she ought to be doing if she’s serious about being a published author at any point in the future.

And below that is Sleepy!Becca. Who is so very, very sleepy.

I know I’m not the only one out there juggling a dozen responsibilities and yet still aspiring and working toward the goal of writing and publishing a novel (or novels). I realize that my struggle is common, and I’m sure many others are handling it with much more grace than I am. I will not give up – I refuse to – but sometimes I have to step back and admit that it’s not easy.

Today is one of those days.

8 thoughts on “Today is not easy

  1. *hugs you*

    There are some days the not easy feels downright impossible. When you wake up the next day, remember it’s a new day. You can start every day with a clean slate.

    Tomorrow will be better Awesome-cp-friendBecca πŸ˜€

    1. Thanks, Awesome-CP-Friend!KT. πŸ™‚ I know – I do try to remember that. Today was tough but not every day is or will be. And the other option is to stop, to give up on the dream, and that would be so much worse than struggling sometimes.

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